CJ and Dawson, Falling short of the best athlete...

Carter and Dawson,

There is no question that talent and performance have been a huge part of your upbringing. Basketball has always been a focus for us. It's what we watch on television, talk about over dinner, spend our time and money on, and argue most about. Do we give up our summers for competitive teams or have more free time and go on family vacations? Do we drive 45 minutes (one-way) three times a week for lessons, or just roll the dice and see if we can make it to the local gym to fine-tune our skills? Do we just focus on this one sport, or experience some others as well?

I've never had a competitive spirit, and I'm the only girl in the family, so I probably should not have been allowed to vote. But, having a great vision in mind for the hearts and character of you two boys, I not only have casted my vote, but also have been quite vocal about it.

I think if either of you were 6' or taller, or had shown amazing natural abilities and talents, I would have been more on board to push you as so many parents are doing with their kids today. But for me, I just thought that teaching you the game, how to be a great teammate, how to work hard, and to keep you active were the main goals. The only downside for you both is that you are good enough athletes to get noticed, but not good enough to really shine without some serious effort and dedication. Have no doubts, I am the one that distracted you from that. Having our weekends free for things other than competitive tournaments was important to me. Watching you learn to play the guitar and piano and dedicate your Sundays to music and time at church was huge for me. Being well-rounded was important, I thought. I just couldn't see how sacrificing everything else was worth some playing time in high school.

So here we are now, at the pinnacle of a young boy's athletic career, and I wonder if I have failed you. It breaks my heart to see you being passed over for play time, and I get really frustrated when you don't play to your potential. Then I realize I am the one that has kept you from that potential. But all the other times I look at you, off the basketball court, I see two boys who are killing it in life. Your character is so amazing and is more to be praised than any outstanding talent in any sport. Most talents are, to some extent, a gift, fine-tuned with hard work and practice. Good character, by contrast, is not given to any of us. We have to build it piece by piece - by thought, choice, courage and determination, from the ground up. And you have done that very successfully.

You have been able to see and do so much in your short lives; things that will continue to shape you forever; things that could have never been possible if we were focusing on one thing, year around, all of the time. I see how you care for other people. You both are compassionate, kind, hard-working, and reliable. You have friends from all kinds of backgrounds, and you have hopefully learned that in life, you have to make you own way - completely on your own feet. Other people cannot create success for you. Please know that, as your mom, it is hard to see you not as successful on the basketball court as you could have been. But know, too, that I wholeheartedly believe in the tradeoff. I love who you both have become and are becoming, and I wouldn't change it for the world!

To the moon and back!

Mom